![]() ![]() These fanged goons are biting their way across America and will outnumber Joe Sixpacks with pulses in precisely 908 days. ![]() The campaign tells the ludicrous tale of John Lloyd, member of a team of plucky commandos fighting a secret war against postmodern vampires called Nightwalkers. About the only good thing about this game is that it doesn't waste your time it broadcasts its awfulness right from the start. Playing Splinter Cell with vampires isn't as cool in reality as it is on paper. This is a mostly straight-up reissuing of last year's debacle, loaded with the same crippling design screwups and absurd difficulty. Alas, the game has been resurrected for a new platform with a subtitle added to it in the hopes of fooling people into believing that this is a superior sequel. Developer Artoon's blend of Splinter Cell-style stealth gaming with toothy creatures of the night was so awful when it debuted for the Xbox 360 last summer that it deserved to be locked inside its coffin for good. If they could be finished off a la Van Helsing, you can bet that Vampire Rain: Altered Species would never have made it to the PlayStation 3. ![]() Vampire games apparently can't be staked. ![]()
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